Get Back Up and Try Again
Coming fresh off what would have been my son's second birthday, I'm here to say that my husband and I are officially trying to have another baby. It's super hard to think about when all I can think about is my son, but that is also just it. I can't stop thinking about my sweet little baby and how badly I would love to have another. To put it all out there, it has taken me extensive time and therapy but I feel like we are finally in a place (although, still a very emotional place) to try for another child.
What I've Been Doing
For something that is so natural and part of the continuation of mankind, it is very complicated. To begin with, I use an app called "Life" to track my periods and ovulation. I know it may not be super accurate but for now it will be my method to the madness, fingers crossed that it works. I also had a meeting with my OB and she prescribed me these amazing prenatal vitamins called Vita Pearl. They are super small and are still packed with all the appropriate nutrients.I like to feel like my body is somewhat back at square one before getting pregnant so that my body can perform at it's best. Thanks to Orange Theory I've gotten back to my normal body weight. For me that means 5 lbs. give or take but that will vary person to person. Each day I drink tons of water and have upped my intake of fruits and veggies, especially leafy greens. I've also traded out my intense circuit training for yoga a few times a week. I'm hoping that yoga will benefit me physically but what I really love about yoga is the mental peace it brings me. I know that I will be a stress case if I get pregnant and want to stay as grounded and stress-free as I possibly can. Namaste!Now let's talk needles. (Say what?!??) I've been doing acupuncture for about a year now as part of my healing process. I absolutely LOVE the woman that I see and I am going to continue to see her. She is so skilled at getting me to relax, talk about my emotions, opening energy blocks, and increasing my blood flow. I am so happy to know her and have her support in this journey.Speaking of needles there are a few more things that I've done for myself. I wasn't one of those women that felt radiant and beautiful during my pregnancies. It was hard for me to be bigger and puffy all over. It took a mental toll on me and I felt like I looked really old. This time around I made sure to get my Botox refreshed before trying again. If I am blessed with getting pregnant it will be a year or more before I get to do any of my fun little treatments. I know it's a super shallow, judge away.
Things I Consider...
Let's be real, there's always something to consider (a.k.a. worry about.) I am a natural born worry wart and part of my personal happiness project is to try my best to eliminate stress. There are proven studies that stress can wreck havoc on your system and actually prevent you from conceiving. I'm trying to eliminate as much stress as possible and simplify my life. Things get so hectic, especially with a toddler running around! Day by day I am trying to create a few quiet moments and let go of my ever-growing to-do list.Even though we are a traveling family I have to put the brakes on a few adventures for now. Believe it or not, Zika is still very active in some parts of the world and there is still no cure. It was all over the news, and now that it receives less attention in the media people may feel like it's not an issue. Before I embark on new worldly adventures I look at The CDC website to make sure I'm not putting myself in any predicaments. (Super bummed, but Cabo you're gonna have to wait for me.)I'm cringing as I write this but I'm going to give clothes shopping a little break until I find out if I get pregnant. I never realized how many new things you'll have to buy when getting pregnant. From new workout clothes, swimwear, new bras and undies, and everything in between. The bank account can sure take a hit when you actually NEED a whole new wardrobe. The crazy part is that I do have some maternity stuff from before but it can all change depending on the time of the year. If you end up mega pregnant in the winter the first time and then in the summer the second time most of your items won't work. That whole saying "I have nothing to wear" or "Nothing fits" will never be more true than when you're pregnant.
I'm being completely open and honest when I say that I'm scared out of my mind to get pregnant again because of what happened last time. I wish the doctors had some sort of answers or reason on why things went the way they did. I wish so much that my son was with me and that I was having a discussion about growing our family from 2 kids to 3. There are so many things that I wish I had control over and I know now that I can't control anything. Part of me actually feels guilty for trying again because I never want to feel like I'm replacing my son or "moving on." I have a few wonderful women I talk to about their "Rainbow Baby" stories and I'm so grateful for their advice and comforting words. I love seeing that it can be done and that life will go on.I welcome any love and prayers sent my way, or if you have any words of wisdom please drop me a line below. I hope that we are blessed enough to write to you all and tell you that I'm able to have another baby and show you the pictures of us bringing that healthy baby home. Thank you for following my journey and showing me so much support. ♥Sincerely,Katy